Frieza's First Day At Preschool
by DJOZ88
Summary: Oh dear! It's Cooler's last year at preschool, but he has to share it with his bouncing baby brother Frieza. Will Cooler survive even one day? Rated K
1. Chapter 1

Cooler: I have a bad feeling about this

Me: no, that's a tree poking you

Cooler: oh

Me: hahaha you know what's going on?

Cooler: you're going to do the disclaimer?

Me: um...you're supposed to reel in horror at the title of the story

Cooler: oh (finally looks at the title)....AHHHHHHHHHHHH why oh, why are you telling this THIS story

Me: I don't own DBZ or Toei or Funimation, i do however own Cooler!

Cooler: i need my therapist!

**Frieza's day at Preschool**

It was a bright and (ironically) sunny day on Planet Ice, as King Cold drove his two tiny purple bundles of joy to preschool.

"_Now Cooler, remember to behave and set a good example for your brother"_, King Cold said upbeatly, _"you know what mummy will do if you are mean to snookums….."_he let the word "snookums" linger, almost as a threat.

Cooler rolled his eyes, he wanted to stick out his tongue, but remember his last experience sticking his tongue out next to his baby brother. He shuddered "it took three weeks to completely wash out that baby spit" he thought to himself.

Frieza meanwhile was strapped into his baby seat and gurgled at the mention of "snookums", before filling his annoying brother quota by grabbing Cooler's right cheek and stretching it. _"Gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah"_! Screamed Cooler, _"Ahh that's so cute"_, replied King Cold, as he glanced from the driver's seat, _"he loves you"_. _"Yeah"_ thought Cooler, _"loves to cause me pain"_, _"zing!"_sang Frieza, before trying to rip Cooler's face off again.

Ten minutes later they arrived at Cooler's preschool, it was his last year, but fate decided that Cooler must spend it with his lovable little brother. The preschool teachers put up a brave face as Cooler marched through the gate, with his eyes looking that they could (and would) literally blast something. King Cold was carrying little Frieza, who decided that daddy's horns would be perfect to swing on.

"_Hello Mr Cold and Cooler"_, Cooler turned his head up to see Ms Nitrogen coming up to him. _"Hi"_was Coolers reply, as he began to massage his face due to the pain Frieza had inflicted on earlier. "_Do you have a boo-boo Cooly-darling?"_ ask Ms Nitrogen, Cooler pouted and looked at his feet _"yes"_, Ms Nitrogen motioned Cooler to the building blocks _"aww poor baby Cooly"_. Cooler decided to rebuild the tower he built last week, but Ms Nitrogen asked him not to go overboard, as trying to build a one-kilometre tower wasn't very safe and secure.

Meanwhile King Cold introduced Ms Nitrogen to his second little bubsey-wubsey. _"Now remember he eats at least once every 2 hours, beware of his face-grabbing and don't make him sneeze"_. _"Is he allergic to anything?"_ asked Ms Nitrogen, _"No"_, replied King Cold, _"but for some completely unexplainable reason every time he sneezes there's an earthquake (or should that be icequate) in the vicinity, oh and there's a lot of snot!"_

By this time Frieza had crawled over to a pile of conviently placed feathers and started to frolic in them. _"Uh-oh"_, thought Ms Nitrogen, _"Its feather day!"_

Right on que Frieza sneezed lightly and a small tremor hit the pre-school. Ms Nitrogen was almost knocked off her feet, Cooler had to rebuild his tower and the other babies began breaking the sound barrier by crying.

**Next: Lunch and Naptime!**

Cooler: _Rocking and sucking his right thumb_

Me: oh come on! It's not THAT bad

Cooler: I never want to go to sleep ever again!

Me: but Frieza is sooooooooooooooo cute!

Cooler: and the Ant is a member of the cat family!


	2. Chapter 2

Cooler: _Why am I here after all this time?_

Me: _I have fans to please_

Cooler: _(wacks head on wall)_

Me: _You're gonna have to face it eventually, so I suggest you get it over and done with_

Cooler: _That guy doesn't own Toei, DBZ and stuff_

Me: _I like stuff_

Cooler: _stuff is good_

**Chapter 2: Lunch and Naptime**

After several burst ear-drums, the pre-school teachers managed to calm every baby down by watching the Teletubbies (works every time).

Cooler had continued to build is enormous tower; through he had to stop after Planet Ice's Air Traffic organisation told him to stop because the tower was becoming an obstruction in the air.

"_Lunchtime," _rang the voice of Ms Nitrogen, who tried to remain upbeat after becoming covered in Frieza's snot after the sneezing and the resulting earthquake.

Ickle baby Frieza continued to gurgle and bounce around the room, but decided to face-palm, Mrs Dri-Ice after hearing lunch was ready.

"_Wunch"_ giggled Frieza, as he was carried to his eating chair, while Cooler sat nearby, perhaps too closely…..

While the younger babies were been fed that soupy stuff that everyone above the age of 3 hates but babies love, the older kids were enjoying chicken and vegetables (convenient earth smuggling plot, juts deal with it).

Cooler, thought that he might be able to survive the rest of the day. "_His royal gurgleness might not destroy me after-all,"_ he thought, spying his baby brother slurping up the unidentifiable mushiness that was his lunch.

But all things must come to an end, as Frieza decided it was time to 'share' his foody goodness: with his brother and surrounding individuals…..

"_Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaap!" _cooed baby Frieza, spilling the contents of his plate….mostly on his brother…

"_ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!" _screamed Cooler, running around and around the table, yelling _"get it off, get it off, get it off!"_

Ms Nitrogen almost giggled, but wisely decided not to. _"Don't worry Cooly-dear," _she said calmly, you do have a spare change of clothes. Promptly Cooler went away to get changed_. "I'm scared for life,"_ he wined.

Interestingly Frieza escaped having any food splattered on him. The little baby cooed and giggled before yawning –with the suction force, almost sucking a spoon into Frieza's mouth.

Mrs Di-Ice suggested that it should be naptime – no one would get hurt in naptime!

Frieza was put in a bassinet, while Cooler cuddled under a blanket on a comfy bed mat. _"At least I can escape in my dreams,"_ he murmured.

But Cooler decided not to say such optimistic ideas, and a rouge feather flew across the room….and on to Frieza's nose….

"_!"_

Next: The last few hours

Cooler (murmuring) _Think nice thoughts think nice thoughts_


	3. Chapter 3

Cooler: Why dies it take you sooooooooooo loooooooooooong to write a simple story?

Daniel: I could finish you dyeing by getting stung by millions of bees…

Cooler (quickly) Take all the time you want….

Daniel: hmmm, where were we?

Cooler: I was just about to win the lottery

Daniel (tersely) and get stung by millions of bees!

Cooler (defeated) You were up to the final hours.

Daniel: hmmmm…I don't own DBZ or anything associated with Toei.

Cooler: I need a vacation!

**Chapter 3: The Final Hours**

After the enormous tornado that was Freiza's sneeze, Cooler felt _quite_ awake. He knew he couldn't yell at Ickle-Freezy as that would add salt to his wounds.

Ms Nitrogen suggested that everyone go outside to play, with the bigger kids running around the large grass area, while the infants resided in the sandbox.

Cooler began running around the oval….like Usain Bolt on steroids. _"At least my brother won't be able to catch me," _he said aloud.

But that statement was only true…as long as Frieza wasn't interested in playing "Catch your brother"…which he decided to play after 10 minutes of playing in the sandbox.

"_Wuther!" _yelled the small white and purple baby, and shot after his bigger brother, like there was no tomorrow.

Ms Dri-Ice saw two shadows flying around the grass and heard a loud THUMP! as Frieza caught Cooler.

For a moment, Cooler though he had been shot…then some alien had latched onto him, but the dribbling and gurgling gave Frieza away.

Cooler could barely control himself; he flung his brother off his back (who continued to gurgle). A lot of things Cooler wanted to say ALL day was about to erupt in a sound-blasting tirade, he didn't care his father catapulted him into the sun!

"YOU ARE A PAIN IN THE ARS….." Cooler stopped his tirade, when Frieza presented him with a piece of paper, he continued to look at Cooler with big beady eyes.

Cooler unfolded the paper and saw it was a picture…of him and Frieza…. playing. Cooler saw that they were having fun, and that was all Frieza thought he was doing to his big brother.

Cooler signed, then smiled. _"I suppose it could be worse," _he murmured. Frieza hopped on his brother's back, and was piggy-backed to the sandbox.

From afar, Ms Nitrogen and Ms Dri-Ice watched to the two kids. _"I think we might just survive this year," _Ms Nitrogen said (slightly relieved).

Ms Dri-Ice quickly agreed, _"We might need to limit Feather Day," _she said _"But overall Frieza seems such a nice baby, and Cooler is just adorable when he pouts!"_

By the end of the day, King Cold arrived to the Pre-School to pick up his favorite bundles of job.

"_Did Freezy-Weezy have a fun day"? _He asked the smallest bundle of joy, who simply laughed and said _"whooooooo!" _Cold's eyes scanned for is bigger bundle of joy, who walked calmly to his father with a broad smile. _"Freezy-Weezy had a great day father," _said Cooler, ignoring the feathers, snot and lumpy food he had to put through.

King Cold eyed Ms Nitrogen, who simply smiled, and mouth _"He survived."_

"_Fantasic! Cooly-dear," _beamed his father, _"Say goodbye to Ms Nitrogen and Ms Dri-Ice children." _

"_Wyyyyy!" _sang Frieza, while Cooler language skills allowed him to say the letter B.

As the three left, King Cold suggested that they stop by the Ice-Cream shop on the way home, then another rouge feather fluttered by Frieza, who caught it with excitement… _"Ah…ah….ACHOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" _Another tremor hit the Pre-School, while Cooler was introduced to another bout of Frieza's snot.

"_Let's make yours a double scoop Cooler," _said King Cold, as he drove off.

"_Anything that will remove the horror," _whispered Cooler, who quickly whipped away another fresh batch of snot from his ears.

"_Maybe there won't be any feathers tomorrow?" _suggested his father.

"_Tomorrow!"_ Cooler thought. It was going to be a long year.

THE END

Daniel: Well that wasn't too bad.

Cooler (Holding his head) The SNOT! Oh the SNOT!

Daniel: Could be worse.

Cooler: How?

Daniel: I could tell the story of your dating life…

Cooler: …I need by therapist!


End file.
